Tuesday, 20 April 2010

I Feel Better

Thank God.

Sorry for not writing much for a while. And if you'd noticed, I've activated my Nuffnang ads again, :). Forgive me if it's kinda distracting.

I still have a long list of pending jobs. Okay, work will never finish, I've learned that. So hopefully I won't complain about unfinished tasks in this blog again. One down, new ones jump into the list kan. But frankly, work makes us happy, feeling needed and functional. Don't you think it makes us feel proud of ourselves?


Somehow, since Putri's around, I think I managed to push myself doing certain things that I feel refrained before. And with her in my life, those things seemed to occur naturally.

She makes me feel mature and childish at the same time (maybe more childish on certain aspects).

More responsible.

More courageous. If somebody going to attack me with parang or pull my hair I won't hesitate to fight back (so back off, heeeyaaah!). That courageous! (Hehe, just kidding).

More loving towards everyone and everything. When my husband decides to set Kontot (our squirrel) free, I respect the decision and agree that Kontot deserve to live freely and enjoy every moment he got in this world. He don't belong to the horrible cage! Before this, I would probably cry.

When Putri cry and wanting nobody else (not even my husband), I feel like a superhero. I'm her savior!

I stop feeling sad, worry and sorry to myself for not being able to get pregnant naturally.

I don't feel sad anymore when I pass through kid's apparel sections. Before this I always avoid looking at the tiny cute clothes.

I don't feel sad anymore when I saw other woman holding baby.

Somehow, some of my fear, subsides.

Of course, all these means I feel happier.

See, God had sent something great to mend my broken heart. So when I'm alone and thinking, I think that only God can give us the love we need in this world.

8 comments:

CAHAYA said...

comelnya Putri. Allah ada perancanganNya sendiri. Be strong.

edi said...

true enough mango! u've found your inner peace with the whole situation and i'm sure u'll get thru everything in between :-)
all the best, and congratulations dear. my love to your princess.

mangosteenskin said...

Cahaya,
Terima kasih. Ya saya percaya itu. Semoga kita sama2 tabah menjalani hidup masing2.

Kak edi,
:) Thank you. Tak dapat saya nak jawap, tp saya yakin kak edi mengerti.

euphoria said...

Finding peace and embracing acceptance. Kadang-kadang kita meletakkan kesempurnaan itu terlalu tinggi utk digapai.
Itulah cabaran kita. Glad to find out you are moving towards that confidently.


:D

mangosteenskin said...

euphy,
Kesempurnaan itu subjektif. Kegembiraan juga. :)

Azlina Abdul said...

Love your post here....and I couldn't agree with you more...you are right....only God can truly give us the love that we need....no other soul can do it better...or perfectly. I'm also happy for your dear...in your new found courage and happiness....I totally get it! :)

Redcomel said...

salam.. sangat tersentuh dgn entry puan..

anak mmg buat kita kuat dan berani.
anak memang bawa erti yang besar dalam hidup, tak penting jika dari bukan dari rahim kita , tapi ia tetap amanah Allah feel happy for you.. :)

@rE-LonG said...

Cutela putri...geram ..hihi ^_^